By Tomilola Coco Adeyemo
Who would have thought?
Who would have thought that mere boobs would be responsible for a lot of listening ears, Yesses and random glances from Strangers?
All hail the power of the female boobs (what? You have never seen men with boobs?)
Anyway, back to why we are here.
This post is two days late, it was provoked twenty four hours ago and was supposed to have been here since then but for some reason, it’s just coming.
But, hey, it is never too late to have a Boobnniversary, is it? Yeah, I’m a genius. I warned you all and you didn’t listen.
Two days ago, I was strolling down my street to buy a bag of pure water (which is like almost N200 now but I refuse to let the hike in the price of pure water drag a page with my boobs. Men wouldn’t like that now, would they? And we do what they like. Oops, I just created the longest bracket known in the history of mankind. You know of one longer? Show me!) and then, while walking like a self respecting citizen that I am, a man who thought there had to be some sort of acknowledgement of my mammary glands yelled from inside a truck, “Ha wo Oyan!”
In English, ‘Ha look at breast”
When I turned, he smiled and waved. He had just given me the biggest compliment, I must have been insane to not have seen it.
But he does not know one thing, no be today.
Flashback to 2005, I was freshly in for my Predegree Program at Obafemi Awolowo University (OAU). My Parents are pretty much overprotective of us so I was never allowed to come home myself all through my University degree.
But sometimes, I tried to prove I was a grown ass girl and came home myself.
This day was one of those days. I left Ife and arrived in Ibadan late afternoon. I remember clearly what I was wearing because I had been desperate then to not show off my boobs.
At the time, I hated that they were so noticeable.
So, I walked to get a Taxi going my way in Iwo Road (a popular Park in Ibadan) dressed in a turtle neck sleeveless top and jeans.
While wading my way through the crowd, some guy saw me and made a nasty comment about my boobs. Actually, he was asking why my boobs were so big in the most distasteful way ever.
I felt humiliated because he had a small audience with him.
That day, I hated my boobs all over again.
If only I knew that was just the beginning. See, as I grew into a woman, I realized my boobs ‘paved the way’, I got attention in a room full of men because of them, people took me ‘more seriously’ because of them. Heck, I have met two big filmmakers in the business, who ogled my boobs all the time I was around them. And no, I wasn’t Kim K’ing my way through the crowd.
So with all of these, Isn’t it just fair I gave the boobs their own
Lucky woman I am to have them.