BY ‘SEGUN ODEJIMI
Genesis 19: 1- 14
1. So, two white men were driving through Sodom but their Uber broke down near the city’s toll gate. And Mr. Lot, on seeing them asked them to come and spend the night at his lounge.
2. But they refused saying they would rather go to a nearby hotel and book rooms and stay till morning.
3. But Lot continued to pressurise them. He told them of how Fulani herdsmen used to unleash mayhem on travellers at night and of the increasing rate of kidnapping – seeing as they were ‘oyinbos’. So they agreed to follow him. And he served them pepper soup and suya and cold cups of skoochies. And they ate and were cool.
4. But before they went to bed, some men led by Bobrisky surrounded the lounge.
5. They asked Mr. Lot to bring out the two men, that they wanted to ‘sample’ them.
6-7. But Lot was like, “Kolewerk!”
8. He said, “But I have two okpekes who never disvirgin. Una fit carry dem go knack. But abeg, make una leave these oyinbos. Na my house dem come.”
9. But Bobrisky and his friends did not leave. They threatened to break down the gate of the house. But while the commotion was on, Bobrisky’s bae called him. So he left. Those remaining kept shouting and threatening Lot.
10-11 But the white men were fed up and they loaded their machine guns, and came outside and they were ready to blow off the brains of the agitators.
12. And on seeing that weapon pass weapon, the men ran away. The oyinbos turned to Lot and said, “Do you have any other family members living with you apart from your daughters and sons and in-laws?”
13. “Because when we get back to our country, we will tell Trump and he will ensure that this whole place is blown up with nuclear bombs.”
14. So let went to talk to his in-laws. But they didn’t believe him. They didn’t believe Trump had the balls to invade their territory.
This is the second in the 21st Century Bible Reading series. You can read the one about NOAH here.