Bomaventure: Adventures Of A Nollywood Wakapass #4
You remember I told you that I have three boyfriends abi?
Well, boyfriend #2 is an Actor. He won one of these talent hunt show for acting over five years ago and his career has refused to leave the runway.
Fornication is part of his problem, I am the remaining part of his problem.
I’m so mad at this person sha, I am still fighting the waterworks but I will hold it for as long as I can.
See, we started dating or as he put it, I started dating him years ago after he won that show.
I cannot even recollect the number of times that we have done it. Name the position, chandelier, underground movement, overhead bridge style, Titanic style (I spread my hands and well we take it from there) and Ceiling fan style.
Oh don’t even go there, these styles exist and I can prove it.
After doing the life out of me, this guy come tell me say we are not together. Omo, I went in and he later said “let’s see how this goes”
In my head, this goes to relationship so I didn’t bother to be checking in every month. I mean, is he my period? Why will I be checking every month if things are the same?
But maybe I should have been checking in.
Last week, I found out he was dating one of those yellow skin actresses. I was angry. I said, “Bros, I thought we were dating. Why are you cheating on me” the stupid guy said, “I said let’s see how it goes, can’t remember asking you out”
My mouth hit the floor. After how many years?
He added that I always conveniently showed up wherever he was and I was choking him. But is it my fault that he is always hanging out places that are close to me? Anywhere is close to me once there is cab o.
Now he has chosen this babe over me. And I am at an audition (which I get more than acting gigs, I go soon turn professional auditioner) and it is almost my turn but I cannot hold the tears again.
As I step inside the room where they will audition me, somebody said “Imagine your boyfriend just broke your heart and got married…”
I don’t have to imagine, that is my true life story.
Anyway, I start crying and these people think I am a born Actress. They give me the role right there and then.
But God forbid that I should forgive that useless Yoruba demon.
I am going to be his problem in this Nollywood. Let me go and see if Linda Ikeji will be willing to hear my story and put it on her blog.
Negative press is a good way to begin to revenge.