BY ‘SEGUN ODEJIMI
So, I’ve been doing some thinking. Not that I normally think. I hardly do, so don’t be fooled.
But like every reaction is believed to be an aftermath of an action, I (no, my boss made me) read an article titled FIFA’s gender testing rule for Women’s World Cup proves controversial , so I started thinking.
Am I really a man? How can I verify that I am one?
I wear some strands of hair around my chin so I’m a man shey? I’ve met thousands of ladies who do. Or am I a man because I chase after skirts like NDLEA has been chasing after Kashamu? Nah. I know ladies who chase after skirts too
especially in Nollywood.
In fact, why am I ranting sef? In a world where there’s so much more uproar about a certain Caitlyn Jenner than about daily killings of little children in Syria, how do you actually determine a person’s sex?
So, I don’t blame the not-so-poor officials at FIFA who, despite rules that call for gender verification of ALL players, can’t produce any records of male players ever being tested to verify their genders.
And the ladies are beginning to vex. Why are they being subjected to gender test when their male counterparts walk the pitch free of such embarrassment, they ask.
What if Christine (that’s what my boss calls Cristiano Ronaldo) is actually a woman? Imagine how many of his fans will die from the shock. Or Messi? Or Sterling? Has anyone ever noticed the way he runs? Like a teenage Kemi. I even hear there is a Newcastle player named Anita! SMH. So why haven’t these people been tested?
And, by the way, who carries out the female testing exercise?
I hear male doctors carry out the tests.
Really? I think I’m in the wrong profession! *begins to draft resignation letter*