BY BINYELUM EWULLUH
Ever wondered how you could quickly produce a movie without having to spend much?
You can stop wondering, I have the perfect answer for you.
Day 1 (Sunday)
Go drinking with your friends and brainstorm. This is the perfect time to make concrete decisions like a movie title that will either make or break your movie.
Decide on the ideal movie title (depending on how much alcohol y’all have consumed), come up with a storyline (feel free to draw inspiration from your environs).
Day 2 (Monday)
Hire a scriptwriter and cameraman. Anyone can be a scriptwriter, depending on the kind of story you have decided to go with. He could be your neighbour, your best friend, or at worst, you might have to pay an Instagram comedian a few thousands to come up with something for you. Not to worry, they don’t charge too much.
A cameraman is very easy to find. The local one down your street should be just perfect.
Day 3 (Tuesday)
Reach out to a few actors (if you can get a hold of their numbers). You’re not calling them because you want them to act in your movie, as your budget won’t permit that kind of long throat. But they just might have siblings that look like them (maybe not as talented) and have the ‘celeb look’.
If that doesn’t work, ask your friends and family. This might even be a better option as you might not need to pay them in advance, if at all.
Day 4 (Wednesday)
Go to a local hotel. Your mission there is to see if it will make a perfect location. You could shoot the entire movie there, just have a few extra curtains and furniture at hand.
Day 5 (Thursday)
You have all you need to start making your movie. What you waiting for? START SHOOTING!!!
Remember, your actors don’t need to be all that great because, let’s be honest, your script is mediocre. So you might want to tell them that improvising is allowed. The script says ‘laugh’ and your main actor thinks crying would be more ideal? By all means, let him cry away. The more spontaneous they are, the more likely they are to convince us.
Day 6 (Friday)
Edit. You might need to touch up a few things here and there. There could be some bad kissing scenes you want to cut off (because there was too much tongue action or not enough of it), some grammatical blunders (but don’t overdo it, we can’t exactly guarantee that yours is any better), some unnecessary shouting, etc etc.
Now your editor is ready to package and duplicate several copies of your movie for you.
Day 7 (Saturday)
Go to Alaba and sell your movie. Your movie is all set and ready to destroy our eyes and ears. Well done! Alaba, here you come!
There you have it. It’s really that simple! Thank me later.
This post first appeared on NET